Near Death

Before I begin, let’s just establish that I’m ok.  I’m not dead, or I wouldn’t be writing this…  Anyways, on a more serious note.

I had a dream last night that I got shot in the chest by some terrorists.  Now I can’t tell you how I ran into these people, I only remember almost getting shot before I actually did. So as time seemed to slow down, I watched a bullet from an old rifle pierce my chest and puncture my heart.  I hit the floor, which didn’t seem to hurt compared to the piece of metal in my flesh.  I immediately tried to apply pressure to my puncture wound.  Never in my life did a dream seem so real.  I don’t believe I’ve ever had a pain so horrifying.

As I tried to save myself, time seemed to past all too quickly.  I began to consider all of my regrets.  I thought of my family and quickly tried to text my wife to tell her that I loved her one last time.  And somehow, this all happened as I’m praying to God and thanking Him for allowing me to die as His child.  Praying that the same grace afforded to me would reach my family, my friends and the whole world.  I hit send on a now bloody phone and the pain becomes unbearable.  As I feel life escaping my grasps, gallons of blood surround me and the regrets of my life intensifies.  I woke, confused and scared.

This brings me to my point.  I woke up feeling like I just had a genuine brush with death.  I know the feeling, I’ve had real encounters with my life on the line.  I can’t help but wonder… what if I really died today?  The worst part of the dream?  Regret.  Feeling like I’ve lost this life and didn’t actually live.  To know that all of the 2nd chances planned for were no more.  To wonder if I’ve done all I’m called to do and if my lack of faith cost anyone their salvation.

I pray that God’s grace would afford me more opportunities and continued life to do His work.  I also pray that He will draw me closer and closer to Him so that I may fear death less and anticipate the day I’m united with Him.

However, there’s work to do.  Are we doing it?  Da Kauze has said numerous times, “faith is an action word.”  If we all wait for the next person to move… well, we achieve nothing.  Let’s stop watching everyone else work and get up and do something!  Life is expensive but death costs more.  Let’s promote the Gospel so His grace may be known… isn’t it why we do what we do?  If so, it’s urgent… As urgent as the next breath we’ll take.  And with every breath, death draws near.  Consider His grace and show His love…


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